Monday, 28 March 2011-04-07
I am struggling with consistency and discipline. My PhD is taking a back seat, again. Lots of excuses. Valid. Reasonable. Explainable. Sincere. Believable. Unbelievable. However, at the end of the day they are excuses! “You can have your PhD. You can have your excuses. You can’t have both!”
Eco, Umberto, Theory of Semiotics (Page 34)
I am reading this in parallel with Blackburn’s book on Ethics, Being Good, and daily readings about World Risk. Japan’s 8.9 earthquake. Nuclear meltdown. Radioactive water released into the sea. Sixty die in floods in Namibia. Floods in the ‘Free State’. It’s getting worse!
[Creates such anxiety.
What is the point?
Will this PhD help?
Shouldn’t I be out planting trees?
Building ponds for Leopard Toads?
Pickling anything I can find?
Packing a backpack for escape?]
The fear and sense of urgency continues. It is almost paralysing. My Internal Conversation is very noisy, messy and full of fear.
I am trying to focus on Eco’s ‘Elementary Communication Model’ for a watershed. The engineer sets up a code to communicate a message to and from the watershed, which would indicate the status of the water levels. There are many possible messages he can receive.
[I am lost. Completely lost]
He calls these messages codes. Eco explains that a Semiotician [clearly, I am not] would ask the engineer ‘all sorts of questions’ such as, ‘What do you call a code? Who is the code for – you or the apparatus?”